NVC - INTENTIONALITY
CULTIVATING HOPES AND DREAMS
God says, "We have put in you a desire and a quest, and I, God, am the protector of that desire."
- Sufi saying
A friend of mine said the other day, there came a time to decide "I am a lover, not a fighter." That phrase carries him daily through all kinds of experiences.
When I recall these things I am reminded of some of the banners I try to wave in my own life: The Fullness of Life -- For All of Us, Forever... Or I return to commitments I've made to myself to cultivate a more compassionate presence: NONANXIOUS, NON-DUAL, NONREACTIVE, NONVIOLENT.
Challenges and conflict are to be expected in human life. Yet, how can I meet my experiences in a way that honors my essential nature? How can I be with what is? allowing things to be what they are... making choices about how I want to meet my circumstances? Only after this, do I want to consider what I will do next.
Do you live in a world where life comes at you or where you bring life out into the world around you? Are you a cup walking about waiting to be filled? Or are you more like a fountain bubbling up from the inside out? This will naturally vary from time to time but overall, what sort of posture do you discover within yourself most often?
WATCH FOR PATTERNS
Consider the start of the day and this desire to zero in on choice, intentionality as a beautiful gift and posture toward life. If we know what we are about in the world and we have a sense that strategies are possible, ways of living that out, ways of experiencing what we long for... most people would call that state of being Hope -- Can I Envision a Future Reality Where I Could Experience What I Long For?...
Amidst the tangle and confusion of many thoughts and emotions stirred around inside throughout my day... Can I name what's there?... look at my interpretations and evaluations, identify and name emotions... Can I continue the pursuit until I can zero in on and completely receive and enter/feel the energy of my passion, my longing? These passions are living energy within us, given to us by God so that we can enjoy the fullness of life. Simply naming them and holding them can move us out of stuck places.
If I allow myself to connect with my longing/intention and possible strategies emerge in my imagination... I have gratitude, hope and a sense of thankful appreciation. I have energy to pursue possibilities. And in my experience my friends, this kind of energy, begets more of the same.
If I allow myself to connect with my longing/intention and roadblocks and practical limits emerge in mind or circumstance...I feel sadness and I can practice grieving which is a practice of self empathy... and in my experience my friends, this kind of intentional grieving usually [grieving has its own timetable, this is not a formula for a quick fix] ... but some good old-fashioned grieving puts me back up on my feet to keep going (smile.)
(And remember, my dear ones, when you grieve you grieve through the heart of God, with and for everyone who has ever the way that you are hurting.)
I may also feel emotions of despair and anger, when I cannot see possibilities. I may have apathy, I may act out aggressively or violently -- toward myself or others, I might blame or judge or become captive to a story of my own making. If these emerge, I do not avoid or pass over them or try to get out of, or beyond what's present. There are no shortcuts. In my experience my friends, it is good to be with God and loving friends through darker times like these... that do pass... although sometimes painfully slowly.
In a few words, intentionality is: Naming my next best way of meeting the moment.
Practice:
Set goals and love yourself enough to stay with them. Ask often, "What Am I about in This World?" Compassionately notice what you do with that answer, again and again. Grieve authentically when you are unable to see your dreams take root and grow... Celebrate with gratitude when they turn into something helpful or healing or peaceful. Later on you might be able to say "Look what rose up out of the ashes of my pain and confusion and worry."
Consider other requests you might wish to make of yourself in the service of your own joy and fullness. Those around you will inherently be blessed by your dreams and hopes. As you let life and love flow through you, you cannot help but become the Light of the world. You can warm yourself in the same glow you set out to ignite. The cold and foreign world may even seem to thaw somewhat, seeing how beautifully you tried to love it.
